Find yourself over-reacting more often than you
prefer?
At times we cross paths with people who like to
get a rise out of us. At other times, small
disruptions can feel really big, especially when
we are tired and stressed
When we have big reactions to little moments it
takes a toll on us-and others. Turning a small
incident into a bigger one can make it
challenging for others to be around, work with,
and trust us fully. Plus it takes a toll on our
health and well being.
So when you feel surprised, broadsided, or
irritated, ask yourself this stabilizing
question: “Is this a problem or really just an
inconvenience?”
What’s the difference? A problem requires your
energy, attention, and good thinking to solve.
An inconvenience is something that occurs that
is not your preference, but it’s really not that
big a deal-unless you make it one.
We all experience dozens of inconveniences on
any given day. They are especially noticeable
when we are tired, stressed, and in defense
mode. Stress impacts our ability to accurately
distinguish between an irritation and a problem.
Remember, the better your self-care, the greater
your resilience. When your resilience is strong
you are able to deal with problems and
irritations much better. What’s important is
maintaining your ability to remain centered and
stable. You don’t need to over-react to
situations or surprises. In fact, it’s much
better for you and everyone around you if you
don’t.
Asking yourself “Is this a problem or really
just an inconvenience?” will benefit you in a
number of ways:
- It will activate your thinking skills,
which helps you stabilize rather than
over-react.
- It will buy you some time and prevent a
reaction or energy drain that you could
regret later.
- It will help you sort out whether the
situation really requires your energy to
solve (problem) or if it is simply a good
time to breathe, gain perspective, and move
forward (inconvenience).
By sorting and addressing situations accurately,
you’ll keep your body’s health-building systems
functioning well, and you’ll have more energy to
deal with the real issues in your life-those
situations that really do need your extra
energy!
-Sally Braun, COHN, Mercer Health
